Ethan is approaching very slowly. At first, he doesn't say anything, he just looks at her. He rarely is the type to look tentative (and this is no different, he isn't tentative or uncertain), and there's still a lot of anger in his chest about a lot of things.

He knows he needs to have more control. He-- he knows a lot of things, but he is helplessly and forever drawn to Ms. Elena Gilbert in whatever state he may be in. Even when she may not want to see him at all.

"Do... you want to see me at all? Because I can leave."

Spoilers: he might not leave even if he can. It's just his way of... gauging something like how she feels about him currently.